Let’s call our band… Jesus Christ and the Fag Bashing Nigga Nazis! It will have like this really nu rave electro sort of art punk/ hip hop feel to it. We’ll make this crazy video and play Old McDonald had a farm T.I. T.I. NOOOOOOO while we are eaten a live by giant chickens! It would be fucking rad!
Sashy!!! You have to come and watch Celine Dion’s live in Las Vegas!!!!!!!
Courtney and her wigga braids! “Girl you betta check yo man!” “She took my bus tub!”
FUCK! I want to join the United Negro College Fund!
Jame’s quote, “Sashy you’re going to be f***ing poor if you stay a vegan! Sashy,at least become a vegetarian! Do you think the CEO of Goldman Sach’s takes his colleagues to a fucking a lesbian coffee house with bad lighting while they listen to shitty folk music!? NO! HELL NO! He takes them to a steak house! So fucking fix it or I’m threw!”
Norwegian cruise line:
“Holy shit! The ketch up dispenser is empty! Oh my God! Oh my God!”
Code big daddy… I repeat Code big daddy! Deck 4 Aft… oil spill! Haha!
Other cruise lines that Patty used to think we worked for… such as…
Royal Carribean, Carnival, Princess, Celebrity, Disney, Holland America, Costa!
Hotel Directors, we miss our ex back up dancers
Hawaii better open up that American Apparel soon or I’m going to start a myspace group about it and bitch to Rupert Murdoch!
Do people still go to Misshapes parties… what is going on in New York these days? Have art stars left Chicago? What is the new jangle? Is Gypster the new thing now? God… does anybody I know have a twitter account other than the 12 people I’ve added? Is that why my phone keeps making those space noises?
Is Cruise West really a legitimate company? Why would anyone work for those people?
Response:
“If you think (an un named source) is white trash… well HOLY SHIT! Go work a contract for Cruise West!”- unnamed source
Did I really apply to work at Club Hedonism? Should I work for Club Med instead?
Williamsburg… how I love you and I would walk the W.B. again!
Fuck Seattle! Alberta St. blows… Hawthorne blah… Bellmont… blah… The Mission… blah… Studio City… blah… Silver Lake BLAH!… Los Feliz… Blah… Baby we gon move to the Marcy Projects because we real tight!
The only thing worse…than gay people in San Francisco: goes down list
are the gay people in Seattle… the Wild Rose makes the Lexington look…glam rock! Fuck the only thing…worse than gay people in Portland is the E room! Fuck…
I think I’m going to sell my car and move back to NYC!
Sashy! I want you to repeat after me… “I’m quitting my job and moving to Cleveland!”
NOHO…= HELL NO
Does anyone else think they should’ve been born back in the…
1960’s and lived in the East Village or is that some kind of left over crack people in Berkeley, CA just smoke… I have seen that movie.. Accross The Universe… What’s better is that I know people that have taken acid watching that movie!!!! They live in the suburbs of Santa Cruz… aka Scotts Valley!
Who feels bad for unhappy Walmart employees?
Has anyone else met Ronald McDonald?
I want to be Oprah Winfrey’s bff Gale!
I love what Jamie said about South America… “Turtle Necks”
I think our job title should be.. “Professional Starbucks Drinker”
Does anyone else want to meet a group of people over 40 who are still bus boys? Let’s set up those Roth Ira’s now!
I want a Vampire Grill too!
I drank too much Grey Goose!
God, Sashy!!! I’m SO angry! I can’t believe that bitch fucking destroyed my mini bar! She said it made her want to drink again! Well, I put her goddamn damn carton of cigarettes down the garbage disposal and said that if she pulled that shit again I was going to dump her cat on the side of the road! Dad said he’d buy me a new mini bar… I said… Dad, “Do you know how much 600 bottles of Grey Goose costs?” I know my father is going through some kind of mid life crisis or whatever but I can’t believe that bitch has taken over MY condo!
I went to my grandma’s house and we were drinking Bourbon and Old Fashions! I told her I had a headache… she then asked me if I wanted an Oxy Cotton!
I am a young white female! I can’t go to West Oakland… Jesus Christ! I am not ghetto!
Why doesn’t this hotel have a bath tub?- James
Best questions of the year…
1. “Is James straight or gay?”
2. “Do you also have a South American lover?”
3. “Why doesn’t America have duel citizenship!!!!????”
4. “What is a key grip?”
5. “Who are those people in the midwest?”
6. “Why the fuck did Stephen Goldfinger cancel on me for dinner!?”
7. “Does Los Angeles really have a subway?”
8. “Are you still a Seventh Day Adventist, Grace?”
9. “Like OMG! Why don’t Japs make Sushi with brown rice? HELLO!”
10. “Um why does Sashy always say… um okay… um okay… um oh.. um okay… um oh when she’s upset?” – James
11. Do you need to know why Madonna is Gay!? Madonna has been named by “The Advocate” as the biggest gay icon of all time! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madonna_and_the_gay_community
see… proof!
12. Why did my parents have to fucking move to Los Angeles!? Why couldn’t we have just grown up on Long Island!!!?
